bali caught me


bali caught up with me, been having nightmares for the past continuous three nights. first i murdered someone, then i couldnt find my check in counter and was running around an airport, then i was slammed for my architectural design of an airport by anthony bourdain [this fierce looking chef]

dreaming
fluorescent light tubes for a stairs
living above where no one knows i was hiding
hiding in a shophouse
hoping to spread it across everywhere

a day of nothingness
tired and bored
wanted to flee the house so badly
but felt no energy

felt no inspiration to do my year end project
until the sun set

a day of nothingness
it is so easy to remember
to easy to forget

living
torrance asked me if I had a blog.
I completely forgot that I had one.
there it is. Time to upkeep.

went for woha xmas lunch.
feels nice to meet pple that I havent seen in a while. to chat, to smile.

went for korean bbq.
trying hard to imagine my life back then when i was in korea. I lost four months to a memory.

you
with each instance
i imagine it is you

with each turn
i wish it was you

but i realise
that no one owns you

that i should learn to let you go

in the darkness
it felt so right
it didnt feel wrong

a sense of disbelief
that one could have gone beyond

to be free from its container
to work for one's desires

to live as one dreamed it would be
for one to be finally free

reading
as with a person
there are several readings

today
the birds chirp in merry play

the sun glows
in its warmth we bathe

the world repeats itself everyday

we should worry about how well we play

film living
we live in a film
in a dramatic plot
to a lush soundtrack
if only we were able to appreciate it
by pausing and savouring each moment

i am happy with
living on a screen reel
in other people's minds

toyo ito said
perhaps we have no future to reach

i couldnt write it out properly
it took three tries
though i am a pessimist
perhaps i cant bear the thought the
indeed we have no future